SOMETIMES WE'RE NOT GONNA SEE EYE-TO-EYE

SOMETIMES WE'RE NOT GONNA SEE EYE-TO-EYE
Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

The Tiger Heard 'Round The World


I knew it would be like this.

The official beginning of the Tiger Woods tour. NBC had promos on the air the day after the Great One announced he was coming back to play. Earlier this morning, the Golf Channel had a countdown to tee off clock on the television screen.

Within a week on sports radio and tv, I've heard from just about anybody who's come into contact with Tiger. I'm rather shocked we haven't checked in with the bathroom attendant at Dove Mountain in Marana, Arizona where the WGC-Accenture Match Play event is being held.

"Mr. Woods flushed once, closed the stall and washed his hands for at least two minutes. Judging by his grip on the soap, I'd say he looks ready to play."

Whew, I love Tiger as much as the next guy but his return is being treated like the resurrection. Playing in the desert this week though, I'd suggest he avoid the boulders. Golf analysts have broken down every aspect of every Tiger swing, all the way back to his childhood appearance on the Merv Griffin Show.

It was refreshing this morning at work when one of our producers asked what was the big story of the day. I told her "Tiger is back, baby!" (If someone from human resources is reading this, I actually said "ma'am" and not "baby".) But that same producer followed up with, "Oh, the Tigers are playing in spring training?" I tried to explain but she seemed bored after I continued to explain for a good five minutes the historical significance of today. "You'll want to remember where you were when Tiger teed off at 2:10," I finally frantically said, walking away frustrated.

Hell, this has gotten so much press, I wouldn't be surprised if Al-Qaeda is taking the day off.

Having heard also from all the medical experts for a week, I feel confident I can perform re-constructive knee surgery if called upon, and I didn't even have to stay at a Holiday Inn.

I'm in a suburb of Detroit... looking live right now. Darn the weather looks great in Arizona. The announcer on tv just informed me that it's just "A matter of moments."

Oh, oh, oh! There's a shot of Tiger! He's wearing a powder blue golf shirt that I can't afford and a white, Nike Tiger Woods golf hat. I can find funds for that. His caddie Steve Williams is right behind him as they're on the first tee. They just announced his name... "Tiger Woods." The gallery goes wild, as if they've just won a car from Oprah. I swear he looks 12 feet tall! He is in great shape though. He's got his club... looking down the fairway... he backs away... back at address... he swings... nice and smooth ... the ball is in the fairway in "great shape."

His opponent Brendan Jones is about to hit... wonderful... I've got time to go grab that beer I forgot to get out of the fridge.

I'm back... Tiger's second shot is on the green, moving toward the hole... it stops about five feet away.

Jones' third shot is now three feet out.

Tiger is sizing up his birdie putt. It's rolling... rolling... 1 up Tiger.

What am I doing writing! I've gotta go.

Believe the hype... TIGER WOODS IS BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

4 comments:

  1. Tiger looked great yesterday. I agree he is back.

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  2. Tiger did surprise me by his play yesterday. I was impressed with his control. Playing target golf on desert courses is not always an easy assignment. As this tournament moves on, his lack of activity will be tested as he faces tougher opponents.

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  3. Back yesterday, gone today. We all thought he'd come back and win it all. Not so much. I'm bummed.

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