SOMETIMES WE'RE NOT GONNA SEE EYE-TO-EYE

SOMETIMES WE'RE NOT GONNA SEE EYE-TO-EYE
Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

ED NEEDS TO TAKE A TIME OUT



Okay, you know when you have one of those Norman Rockwell moments; you can't help but feel good as a dad.

There you are sitting in front of the big-screen TV, the bigger the better because size matters, your young son or daughter adoringly by your side, watching sports, taking a vested interest.  Maybe, just maybe, you have a player in the making. 

The kid is asking all the right questions.  Dad, why did they call a timeout?  What happened to the shot clock? What is traveling? What's defensive interference? (A few NFL refs might want to brush up on that one as well) What's a double-play?  You get the idea.  You've been there.

But, before you can wipe the butter popcorn off your fingers, it's a commercial break.  And without warning, BOOM... there it is.  "Dad... what is Erectile Dysfunction?"

Are you freaking kidding me!  Enough already!  Whatever happened to age appropriate programming?  ED is not exactly the conversation you want to have with your kid during the Lakers-Celtics game.  "Well, son, if I take one of those pills, your mom and I are going to go one-on-one by the fourth quarter.  And there might be overtime."

"Hey dad, it says it can last up to 36 hours."  Of course, if you have a teenage son, his interest peaks when he hears... "If you experience an erection lasting more than four hours... "

And doesn't Las Vegas seem even more tempting with the "Viva Viagra" song?  What happens for a long time in Vegas, stays in Vegas.

Oh, sure, the FCC can throw its weight around and issue hefty fines when Janet Jackson's breast gets exposed for the blink of an eye during a Super Bowl halftime show.  But prime-time talk of a stronger, longer lasting erection while the family's together, is advertising at its best.

Growing up, I remember my mom used to have difficulties trying to explain to me what tampons were while she watched her daytime soap operas.  I haven't seen one of those ads in years.  I don't see them during WNBA games, women's college softball, the LPGA.  I guess women really haven't come that far because they're taking a back seat to all those big, bad, pill popping men, some of whom are ready in as little as thirty minutes.

I know ESPN and the various networks showing sporting events need ad revenue to survive but some executive needs to step up and say, we're going soft during certain hours of the day.


There are some conversations better left for the bedroom -- not the family TV viewing room. 




Sunday, December 6, 2009

LET'S BRING BACK HAPPY NEW YEAR



For the Kanye West, Lady Gaga generation, there used to be a time when ringing in the New Year meant partying until the wee hours and then waking up late -- 11AM or later -- to be pleasantly greeted with a day long feast of college bowl games.

New Year's Day used to be sacred.

The Rose, Sugar, Cotton and Orange Bowl all headlined on the same day.  The various broadcast networks staggered start times and it was pure fan heaven.  Now when the BCS title game gets underway, it seems at about the same time pitchers and catchers have to report.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

WOUNDED TIGER WILL ROAR AGAIN

For the past week and counting, Tiger Woods has had to negotiate the trickiest slope of his life – a slippery one.

tiger2In the blink of an eye, the millisecond it takes to get into a car crash, the air bag deflated on his pristine reputation.  Herculean on the golf course, Tiger admitted last week that when off the fairway, he was human like everybody else.  Prone to make mistakes.